Baudelaire & Cheers to You.

Get Drunk


Always be drunk.
That's it!
The great imperative!
In order not to feel
Time's horrid fardel
bruise your shoulders,
grinding you into the earth,
Get drunk and stay that way.
On what?
On wine, poetry, virtue, whatever.
But get drunk.
And if you sometimes happen to wake up
on the porches of a palace,
in the green grass of a ditch,
in the dismal loneliness of your own room,
your drunkenness gone or disappearing,
ask the wind,
the wave,
the star,
the bird,
the clock,
ask everything that flees,
everything that groans
or rolls
or sings,
everything that speaks,
ask what time it is;
and the wind,
the wave,
the star,
the bird,
the clock
will answer you:
"Time to get drunk!
Don't be martyred slaves of Time,
Get drunk!
Stay drunk!
On wine, virtue, poetry, whatever!"

Charles Baudelaire

Visitation

Although it appeared to be daytime, the world thought it was night. The winter haze made all the hours look the same. The snow that fell softly on my face melted as kisses - cold but not cruel. You flew down from the sky - filling all of my vision. My friend, I know it is you and yet I trembled in fear as you brushed my face with black feathers. So tenderly you fly across again, threatening to lash out, to fill the air with shrieks of rage and yet you land on my arm and I feel the power disguised in such a delicate shell. As I put you up in the tree as you morph again into another shape I cry for the beauty and the cruelty of your freedom.

list.

Here is a list of random things about me.

1. I often experience what seems to be not really instant but very fast karma. For example, my boyfriend lost his fingernail from accidentally shutting it in the window. It grossed me out and I made fun of it's appearance and asked him to not get his gangrene on me. Jokingly. I flipped off our bulldog because he pissed me off. Seriously. This weekend I went to give the dog a bone and he bit my middle finger. I am now losing my fingernail and it is way more fucking disgusting than my boyfriends.
2. I am afraid of getting on and off of escalators. I get very nervous as I approach them and lose any sense of grace.
3. I use about 6 packets of Taco Bell sauce for one taco.
4. I hate the smell of leather. Leather with cologne and or cigarette smoke makes me want to puke.
5. I am currently smoking more and more instead of cutting back. But I don't smoke during the day - just at night & weekends but I do intend to quit.
6. I have the most interesting dreams, filled with adventure and beautiful or terrifying imagery. But I won't tell you about them, because of course that would bore you.
7. I am afraid I might become a cat collector lady one day.
8. I believe there is so much magic and mysterious wonderful things that are unseen and unknown simply because people are afraid of being embarrassed. I also believe people are taught (self or otherwise) to not see them by intoxication or over stimulation from music, tv, sex etc. While all of these things are absolutely fun -believe me I get my fair share of all of them, I do think the subtle energies found in quiet observance provide equally satisfying sensations.
9. To me a home without animals is too sterile and quiet.
10. I really don't like talking on the phone. I am not much of a talker in general.

New Year

This new year's eve was spent with a small group of friends. We spent the evening around a fire pit having beer or vodka drinks. It was to be quiet and away from the crazy drunk people at the bars. But we became crazy drunk people and fight club broke out, which for us consists of playful but full strength wrestling - co-ed. I managed to escape with only a couple of rug burns and a large bruise on my arm. One of our friends (probably the baddest ass) ended up fracturing her foot. Shit! Good thing we avoided the crazies! Ha, of course two days later we discussed the fact that our little game should probably be left to young kids or professional wierdos who do not need to explain the injuries from a quiet new years eve amongst a small group of friends...